Ketchup Chips: One More Reason My Son Will Make A Great Husband Someday
I was out last night at 1 a.m. buying ketchup chips with my oldest son. We went to the local “open 24 hours” grocery store. Really, don’t ask. Suffice it to say, as strange as what we were doing sounds, even stranger things were happening INSIDE the store.
There was a lady in there – she must’ve been about eight months pregnant – buying a pack of Marlboro cigarettes for her husband/boyfriend/partner. How do I know this? Because she was on the phone with him asking exactly what kind he wanted. I guess it could’ve been her dying father. Or maybe her “you do this for me, I’ll do something even better for you” brother. It sure as hell wasn’t her lesbian lover. No other female would ask that of a pregnant woman.
“Don’t you think that’s strange?” said my son when he saw this. “That she’d be out so late buying cigarettes for someone, and in her condition?”
“We don’t know the whole story. Maybe her husband just came home from working three double shifts in a row, and she was doing this as a favour for him. Or maybe they both work nights, and to them, it’s the middle of the afternoon. It wouldn’t be such a big deal then.”
“She looked tired though…and annoyed.”
“I don’t know.”
“The guy is probably just a jackass.”
“Make sure you never act like that.”
“As if. Besides, I don’t smoke.”
“It’s not like you’d try to coerce someone into going to the store at one in the morning to get you a bag of ketchup chips though. That’s almost as bad.”
“At least I came with you. Think of it as bonding time with your son.”
“Right. That’s exactly what I was thinking. Now, can we bond back at home – you in your bed, me in mine, the both of us sleeping? I bond much better that way.”
“Sure, Mom. You want a chip?” He opened the bag in the car. We ate most of them before we even hit our street.
FYI, we didn’t really go out last night just to get ketchup chips. The reason was actually pretty important. Not life-threatening or anything, as you can probably tell by the fact that we’d stopped to buy ketchup chips, but necessary nonetheless.
It is another long and convoluted story that I will save for a different day. Be happy knowing that we are one step closer to saving the world, and by “saving the world” I mean “putting on a music festival the likes of which our city has never seen“. OK, so Ottawa is known for its festivals, and this will be one among many, but it’s still going to be great. And my one son will be rapping while the other will be singing his little “rock ‘n soul” heart out. Pictures and videos to come September 20th, 2013. Stay tuned!